Psychological Defense Mechanisms
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According to Freud and his followers, our psyche is a battlefield between instinctual urges and drives (the id), the constraints imposed by reality on the gratification of these impulses (the ego), and the norms of society (the superego). This constant infighting generates what Freud called "neurotic anxiety" (fear of losing control) and "moral anxiety" (guilt and shame).
But these are not the only types of anxiety. "Reality anxiety" is the fear of genuine threats and it combines with the other two to yield a morbid and surrealistic inner landscape.
These multiple, recurrent, "mini-panics" are potentially intolerable, overwhelming, and destructive. Hence the need to defend against them. There are dozens of defense mechanisms. The most common among them:
Acting Out
When an inner conflict (most often, frustration) translates into aggression. It involves acting with little or no insight or reflection and in order to attract attention and disrupt other people's cosy lives.
Denial
Perhaps the most primitive and best known defense mechanism. People simply ignore unpleasant facts, they filter out data and content that contravene their self-image, prejudices, and preconceived notions of others and of the world.
Devaluation
Attributing negative or inferior traits or qualifiers to self or others. This is done in order to punish the person devalued and to mitigate his or her impact on and importance to the devaluer. When the self is devalued, it is a self-defeating and self-destructive act.
Displacement
When we cannot confront the real sources of our frustration, pain, and envy, we tend to pick a fight with someone weaker or irrelevant and, thus, less menacing. Children often do it because they perceive conflicts with parents and caregivers as life-threatening. Instead, they go out and torment the cat or bully someone at school or lash out at their siblings.
Dissociation
Our mental existence is continuous. We maintain a seamless flow of memories, consciousness, perception, and representation of both inner and external worlds. When we face horrors and unbearable truths, we sometimes "disengage". We lose track of space, time, and the continuum of our identity. We become "someone else" with minimal awareness of our surroundings, of incoming information, and of circumstances. In extreme cases, some people develop a permanently rent personality and this is known as "Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)".
Dissonance
Not strictly a defense mechanism, it still exhibits many of the hallmarks of one.
Cognitive Dissonance: simultaneously harboring two or more conflicting pieces of information or contradictory thoughts.
Dissonance is intolerable. We
resolve it by using a variety of, mostly alloplastic psychological defense
mechanisms - like displacement or rationalization - and narrative solutions,
such as reframing
We also tend to externalize the locus of control (and thus our agency,
self-control, autonomy, or free will in the matter): It wasn't my fault,
something or someone made me do it or inexorably and irresistibly led to what
happened!
Cognitive
dissonance is when someone holds simultaneously two conflicting views,
values, or bits of information which call for diametrically opposed decisions
or actions. This state of things generates an inner conflict and triggers
several primitive (infantile) defense mechanisms such as denial, splitting,
projection, and reaction formation.
One way to cope with this predicament - to transition from dissonance to consonance
- is to come up with a reconciling narrative, a theory which seamlessly
accommodates both conflicting points of view or data.
Such soothing fiction falls into several categories:
1. Temporal: A is true at one time and not-A is true at another period.
Or: A is a transient state of affairs.
2. Reactive: A is the normal. Not-A happened because of some trigger,
provocation, or change in circumstances or conditions. Not-A is abnormal, and,
therefore, an aberration or a mere curiosity.
3. Inclusive: both A and Not-A are pieces of a bigger puzzle, picture,
or theory. Their contradistinction is only apparent because we have no access
to or awareness of the true and full picture, our knowledge or capacity to know
are limited.
4. Denial: both A and Not-A are true and lead to the same conclusions.
There is no contradiction. For example: he loves me. He beats me up. But his
battering just proves that he loves me, it is his way of showing that he loves
me.
5. Defensive: both A and not-A are valid. But only A applies to me while
not-A may apply to others (splitting). Not-A is bad (projection) and should be
eradicated in others in order to restore A to its rightful place as the sole
viable and ethical alternative (reaction formation).
Volitional Dissonance is when we act in ways which we perceive to be
akratic, immoral, or antisocial, rather than phronetic. When we perceive our
actions to have been the outcomes of akrasia (weak willed misbehavior contrary
to our best judgment) and not of phronesis (good judgment, excellence of
character, habits conducive to eudaimonia - a good life - and practical virtue)
Other dissonances include:
Emotional Dissonance (aka ambivalence): experiencing two opposing
emotions (such as love and hate) which are elicited by the same object;
Axiological Dissonance occurs when two dearly upheld and deeply felt
values are incompatible;
Deontic Dissonance is a subspecies of this dissonance: when
one has two irreconcilable duties or obligations;
Attitudinal Dissonance is an inner conflict between two contradictory
internalized beliefs, attitudes, statements or propositions held to be true.
Executive Dissonance is an inner conflict between two mutually obviating or mutually exclusive psychological functions held to be necessary and desirable.
(continued below)
This article appears in my book "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited"
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Fantasy
Everyone fantasizes now and then. It helps to fend off the dreariness and drabness of everyday life and to plan for an uncertain future. But when fantasy becomes a central feature of grappling with conflict, it is pathological. Seeking gratification - the satisfaction of drives or desires - mainly by fantasizing is an unhealthy defense. Narcissists, for instance, often indulge in grandiose fantasies which are incommensurate with their accomplishments and abilities. Such fantasy life retards personal growth and development because it substitutes for true coping.
Fantasy is a psychological defense
mechanism: "One day I will (divorce my spouse, make millions, move to live
in ...)". Fantasy has many functions: to avoid a painful or disagreeable
(ego-dystonic) reality; to rehearse, plan, and prepare for possible futures
founded on strong wishes or desires (including of a sexual nature); to escape
into imaginative daydreaming and render life more pleasant; to act as an
organizing principle with explanatory power; to compensate for lacks and
deficiencies in oneself (narcissistic compensatory fantasy) or in one's life;
and so on.
It is generally true that fantasy is a substitute for action. He who fantasizes
rarely acts and she who acts rarely talks. To fantasize is to procrastinate and
fantasies often include elements of unattainable perfectionism and unrealistic
goals, narratives, and scenarios precisely in order to justify and account for
such inaction. Often people conjure up conditional fantasies: "I will (do
that or be there) IF (certain usually difficult or impossible conditions) are
met." The conditions thus imposed ascertain that the fantasy can never be
realized.
Some people have made fantasy their main realm of existence and their
overriding preoccupation. Society affords such individuals socially-sanctioned
outlets: they can write fiction or make films. But the majority of fantasists
lose touch with reality and rapidly descend and degenerate into
psychopathological states such as narcissism or paranoia. Some people fantasize
precisely in order to transcend or flee social inhibitions, constraints, or
mores. Some paraphilias - such as pedophilia and fetishism - and some sexual
practices emanate from powerful conscious fantasies.
Idealization
Another defense mechanism in the arsenal of the narcissist (and, to lesser degree, the Borderline and Histrionic) is the attribution of positive, glowing, and superior traits to self and (more commonly) to others. Again, what differentiates the healthy from the pathological is the reality test. Imputing positive characteristics to self or others is good, but only if the attributed qualities are real and grounded in a firm grasp of what's true and what's not.
Isolation of Affect
Cognition (thoughts, concepts, ideas) is never divorced from emotion. Conflict can be avoided by separating the cognitive content (for instance, a disturbing or depressing idea) from its emotional correlate. The subject is fully aware of the facts or of the intellectual dimensions of a problematic situation but feels numb. Casting away threatening and discomfiting feelings is a potent way of coping with conflict in the short-term. It is only when it become habitual that it rendered self-defeating.
Omnipotence
When one has a pervading sense and image of oneself as incredibly powerful, superior, irresistible, intelligent, or influential. This is not an adopted affectation but an ingrained, ineradicable inner conviction which borders on magical thinking. It is intended to fend off expected hurt in having to acknowledge one's shortcomings, inadequacies, or limitations.
This article appears in my book "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited"
Click HERE to buy the print edition from Amazon (click HERE to buy a copy dedicated by the author)
Click HERE to buy the print edition from Barnes and Noble
Click HERE to buy the print edition from the publisher and receive a BONUS PACK
Click HERE to buy electronic books (e-books) and video lectures (DVDs) about narcissists, psychopaths, and abuse in relationships
Click HERE to buy the ENTIRE SERIES of sixteen electronic books (e-books) about narcissists, psychopaths, and abuse in relationships
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Projection
We all have an image of how we "should be". Freud called it the "Ego Ideal". But sometimes we experience emotions and drives or have personal qualities which don't sit well with this idealized construct. Projection is when we attribute to others these unacceptable, discomfiting, and ill-fitting feelings and traits that we possess. This way we disown these discordant features and secure the right to criticize and chastise others for having or displaying them. When entire collectives (nations, groups, organizations, firms) project, Freud calls it the Narcissism of Small Differences.
Projective Identification
Projection is unconscious. People are rarely aware that they are projecting onto others their own ego-dystonic and unpleasant characteristics and feelings. But, sometimes, the projected content is retained in the subject's awareness. This creates a conflict. On the one hand, the patient cannot admit that the emotions, traits, reactions, and behaviors that he so condemns in others are really his. On the other hand, he can't help but being self-aware. He fails to erase from his consciousness the painful realization that he is merely projecting.
So, instead of denying it, the subject explains unpleasant emotions and unacceptable conduct as reactions to the recipient's behavior. "She made me do it!" is the battle cry of projective identification.
We all have expectations regarding the world and its denizens. Some people expect to be loved and appreciated - others to be feared and abused. The latter behave obnoxiously and thus force their nearest and dearest to hate, fear, and "abuse" them. Thus vindicated, their expectations fulfilled, they calm down. The world is rendered once more familiar by making other people behave the way they expect them to. "I knew you would cheat on me! It was clear I couldn't trust you!".
Rationalization or
Intellectualization
To cast one's behavior after the fact in a favorable light. To justify and
explain one's conduct or, more often, misconduct by resorting to
":rational, logical, socially-acceptable" explications and excuses.
Rationalization is also used to re-establish ego-syntony (inner peace and
self-acceptance).
Cognitive dissonance – the state of having simultaneous and equipotent but
inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes - usually provokes
rationalization. It involves speech acts which amount to the devaluation of
things and people very much desired or perceived positively but frustratingly
out of one's reach and control or socially deemed unacceptable. In a famous
fable, a fox, unable to snag the luscious grapes he covets, says: "these
grapes are probably sour anyhow!". This is an example of cognitive
dissonance in action.
Reaction Formation
Adopting a position and mode of conduct that defy personally unacceptable
thoughts or impulses by expressing diametrically opposed sentiments and
convictions. Example: a latent (closet) homosexual finds his sexual preference
deplorable and acutely shameful (ego-dystonic). He resorts to homophobia. He
public berates, taunts, and baits homosexuals. Additionally, he may flaunt his
heterosexuality by emphasizing his sexual prowess, or by prowling singles bars
for easy pick-ups and conquests. This way he contains and avoids his unwelcome
homosexuality.
Repression
The removal from consciousness of forbidden thoughts and wishes. The removed
content does not vanish and it remains as potent as ever, fermenting in one's
unconscious. It is liable to create inner conflicts and anxiety and provoke
other defense mechanisms to cope with these.
This article appears in my book "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited"
Click HERE to buy the print edition from Amazon (click HERE to buy a copy dedicated by the author)
Click HERE to buy the print edition from Barnes and Noble
Click HERE to buy the print edition from the publisher and receive a BONUS PACK
Click HERE to buy electronic books (e-books) and video lectures (DVDs) about narcissists, psychopaths, and abuse in relationships
Click HERE to buy the ENTIRE SERIES of sixteen electronic books (e-books) about narcissists, psychopaths, and abuse in relationships
Click HERE for SPECIAL OFFER 1 and HERE for SPECIAL OFFER 2
Follow me on Twitter, Facebook (my personal page or the book’s), YouTube
Splitting
This is a "primitive" defense mechanism. In other words, it begins to
operate in very early infancy. It involves the inability to integrate
contradictory qualities of the same object into a coherent picture. Mother has
good qualities and bad, sometimes she is attentive and caring and sometimes
distracted and cold. The baby is unable to grasp the complexities of her
personality. Instead, the infant invents two constructs (entities), "Bad
Mother" and "Good Mother". It relegates everything likable about
mother to the "Good Mother" and contrasts it with "Bad
Mother", the repository of everything it dislikes about her.
This means that whenever mother acts nicely, the baby relates to the idealized
"Good Mother" and whenever mother fails the test, the baby devalues
her by interacting, in its mind, with "Bad Mother". These cycles of
idealization followed by devaluation are common in some personality disorders,
notably the Narcissistic and Borderline.
Splitting can also apply to one's self. Patients with personality disorders
often idealize themselves fantastically and grandiosely, only to harshly
devalue, hate, and even harm themselves when they fail or are otherwise
frustrated.
Read more about idealization followed by
devaluation - click on the links:
http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/faq43.html
http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/faq44.html
http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/devaluediscard.html
Sublimation
The conversion and channelling of unacceptable emotions into socially-condoned behavior.
Freud described how sexual desires and urges are transformed into creative
pursuits or politics.
Undoing
Trying to rid oneself of gnawing feelings of guilt by compensating the injured
party either symbolically or actually.
Many additional Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) about Personality Disorders - click HERE!
Psychological Signs and Symptoms
Psychological Tests and Interviews
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